**Here is a copy of a conversation I recently had with a friend of mine who also didn't pass the July Bar**
Friend: It's hard not to feel like everyone is judging us. I feel like everyone just decided I won't be anything but a second rate lawyer now...
Me: It's dumb because how I do on MBE is no reflection on how I will practice law. I don't think I will be second rate once I pass. The only reason I didn't pass was the MBE. Everything else had high scores.
Me: Failure of multiple choice questions does not make me second rate. And people who may have just lucked into the right answers aren't automatically better than me.
Me: I know plenty of people who passed whom will not make good attorneys.
Me: When I pass, which I will, because I won't give up, I will work my ass off to show that this is what I am meant to do
Friend: Yeah... me too. I got high scores on everything but MBEs too... and failed by 1 percent... but I feel like such a loser
Friend: I'm kind of feeling self-loathing right now... like everyone in my life (besides ****) was right... I'm nothing and it finally caught up to me
Friend: You have a winner's perspective! That will make you the great lawyer!
Me: I've just spent too much time feeling bad and worthless. But this test does not determine the kind of lawyer I will be. Maybe if it was actually relevant to what we will do in practice... But its not... At all.
Me: It's an outdated and pedantic way of testing us. It's what they have always done and the people in charge want to make everyone else go through what they did way back in the day, even if it's not the best way. It's like law school and the curve
Friend: You are right. It really doesn't... I know that too
Friend: I feel I will do a good job too... much better than some of the people who (shockingly) did pass! Tee-hee!
Me: It's just annoying that a stupid multiple choice portion is keeping me from accomplishing my goals. I think that's what I'm most upset about
Me: I don't like to say I failed, because I don't think I'm a failure. I didn't pass. And that's what I said
Me: I know that I know the law. I know that I know it well and know how to apply it. The fact that I can't figure out trick questions hinging on one or two words does NOT make me a failure
Friend: I concur counselor! :)
Hear hear. I concur as well :)
ReplyDeleteSeriously. I have had this EXACT conversation with so many people. And, even though I wish all of us had appeared on the pass list - it helps to know we're all out there. And that we're going to be badass attorneys. If nothing else, I know I will remember this experience and pass on some hugs to the future attorneys who I encounter who may not have "got it" the first time around. :)
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